


Scribbles you Wrote in my Heart

by NewAllegroBeat



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Romance, Slice of Life, Teen Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-14
Updated: 2015-02-05
Packaged: 2018-02-17 07:28:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 16,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2301419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NewAllegroBeat/pseuds/NewAllegroBeat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>People nowadays don't really believe in soul mates. HyukJae can’t blame them; hadn’t he met DongHae, he would have been one of the former. Sweet cheery DongHae who, incidentally, does believe in soul mates. {30 Day OTP Challenge}</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Familiarity (Holding Hands)

**Author's Note:**

> Just simple outtakes from the lives of DongHae & HyukJae, together.

It’s noticeable, HyukJae guesses, how DongHae and he are constantly around each other—okay, maybe you’d have to be an idiot to _not_ see it.

But the thing is, it’s not on purpose, or _not really (_ fanservice aside, of course); it’s actually just an intrinsic habit they’ve had ever since HyukJae can remember.

It’s like this: when you become a trainee you are separated from the real world to be immersed in a parallel state of reality, one where you are nothing until you’re something bigger, greater. The younger you are, the more alienated you turn out.

It can get so _lonely._ Yet for some it’s actually not, because if you’re lucky enough you’ll manage to create your own family along the way. Hyungs can be parents, dongsaengs siblings, trainers ever present guidance, and so you begin to build everlasting friendships.

And there once was this very scrawny kid fresh from a small town, still bearing an accent, with this puppy _je ne se quoi_ and the sweetest smile HyukJae’d ever seen. He was _also_ an amazing dancer and every bit of an H.O.T fan as JungSu, JunSu, SungMin and HyukJae himself. It was obvious they’d hit it off—not that anyone would’ve guessed they’d later hit it off _that_ much.

So. HyukJae can’t really tell when it _all_ started; for that he’d need a century of over-analyzing and that’s not as worth as just _enjoying_ it.

All he knows is that somewhere along countless hours of practice, stolen break games, endless walks to the bus stop, both had started to _care_ , to _need._ Hugs and simple touches suddenly were a norm, and both became conditioned to seek for it, to feel security from a mere brush of hands, to _be certain_ that this particular brand of warmth meant everything was alright.

All he knows is that when they were told they were going to be famous, that they were now part of Super Junior 05; he clutched DongHae’s hand for dear life as they felt excitement, happiness, fear, hysteria, _everything,_ flooding their bodies. And he realized then—as long as they had this, as long as he was able to hold DongHae’s hand just like this, he would know everything was okay. Through it all, they would be each other’s grounding.

It’s a bit overwhelming, HyukJae thinks, that after all these too short yet so long years, _that_ hasn’t changed.

And _That_ is what everybody notices.


	2. Personal Space (Cuddling Somewhere)

“Oh my _God_ , could you _move_ your super huge ass away from me?” HyukJae retorts, trying to push DongHae off his lap. He’s starving, tired and sore from too many practices that never seem to end and he just wants to have a sandwich and go to fucking sleep. Is it too hard to understand? He understands they’ve all been under this ultra-high pressure because of this sort of ‘second debut’ as a thirteen-member boyband, but isn’t the fact that they are all equally tired all the more reason to get off each other’s backs?

“Well, I’m sitting here too, aren’t I?” DongHae barks back, proving his point by splaying himself all over HyukJae’s lithe body in the most uncomfortable way imaginable.

They hiss at each other for a couple of seconds longer before JungSu hyung finally snaps and yells at them what everyone else in the van is thinking. “Shut the fuck up! We’re all exhausted, head-aching, and you two dancing twins better shut your mouths and stop bickering if you don’t want to go back to the dorms on foot!”

They both stay still for a moment. It’s so not like JungSu to freak out like that that it makes them realize how annoying they are both being.

“I’m sorry, I’ll try to keep distance” DongHae finally mutters, moving away the most he can due to their position, but HyukJae sighs and pulls him closer, wrapping his arms around him in a way that’s so familiar and comfortable they wonder why were they fighting about something this silly in the first place.

“No, it’s ridiculous. We almost always share a bed and we can’t share a seat? I mean—” he tries to move quickly from _that topic_ (his teammates have started to give them a little bit of a harsh time about it, claiming they both possess fully-functioning beds) before it gets awkward. “I _mean_ , we were being brattish. Come on.”

He holds DongHae against his body and buries his face in the other’s neck crook, closing his eyes to push away the headache. DongHae slumps in his arms and makes this cute puppy sound that quirks HyukJae’s lip corners slightly upwards. Suddenly it’s like they’re the only ones in the van, drowning in their personal bubble of coziness. Donghae’s body is warm and pliant and just… so _his._

His head jerks up at this thought, which is not only insane but has been recurrent this past couple of months, and has little to do with how they haven’t been able to date in what seems like forever and everything to do with the way HyukJae’s heart leaps every time he hears DongHae’s earnest laugh.

“Are you alright?” DongHae mutters, his voice charged with heavy sleep.

“Yeah… yeah.”

 

Once they are all crawling through their apartment to get to their much-missed bedrooms, HyukJae stops for a minute to look at his best friend. “You’re not… uhm…?” he gestures to the door of the room he shares with SungMin, but DongHae shakes his head.

“You’re tired. I’m tired. It’s… Let’s rest, ‘kay? I’ll see you tomorrow” he waves goodnight and goes back to his own room, and HyukJae tries to pretend he’s not _this_ bothered by the fact that DongHae just did a very mature thing by giving HyukJae, and himself, their much needed space, _personal_ space.

They might be growing up, and that is a damn scary thought.


	3. Awkward (Gaming/Watching a Movie)

“There, there! Right! _TO THE RIGHT!_ ”

“Crap, Hae, I know what I’m doing!”

“Shut up you ARE DISTRACTING ME!”

The five of them are on the living room, KyuHyun and DongHae on the couch while HyukJae’s on the floor, the three of them shouting and pressing control buttons like there’s no tomorrow. SungMin is browsing through a magazine while cheering occasionally, and KiBum is reading a book and pretending he’s not paying attention to them—he doesn’t like to admit he _enjoys_ watching them bicker over video games.

Abruptly everything becomes silent.

SungMin drops his magazine. KiBum looks up from his book, interested.

“Did you just beat KyuHyunnie, Hyukkie?” DongHae mutters, his face blank and baffled.

KyuHyun drops his controller as HyukJae and DongHae look at each other.

And then it explodes.

“FUCK YEAH I DID!” HyukJae screams and launches up the couch to hug the air out of his best friend as everyone cheers while KyuHyun sulks. This cannot be possible. He was _not_ just beaten at fucking Mario Kart. He’s a pro gamer, for crying out loud! He pushes the duo down the couch, but they don’t even complain, too absorbed in their celebration to care.

  
And then _something_ happens. It’s too fast for KiBum to see, but SungMin and KyuHyun who have been paying attention do. DongHae and HyukJae were hugging one moment, then kissing softly the next. It’s nothing too outrageous, just a simple touch of lips that seemed so _natural,_ innocuous _._ However, when they think about it, when the impression sinks in, the other three feel not like voyeurs but accomplices; they’re witnessing something _wrong_ and not stopping it.

There’s another silence, more pushing this time, almost unbearable. KiBum lifts his gaze from his book, wanting to ask what the hell, but something in his very intuitive core tells him to keep his mouth shut.

DongHae and HyukJae open their eyes. They freeze. They pale and blush at the same time, break apart as if their touch burnt, looking everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Nobody dares to say a word.

This is not a new or unusual occurrence.

Lately there’s been a lot of tiptoeing around the whole ‘DongHae and HyukJae’ subject; awkward silences, side glances, distracting coughing. It’s like _EunHae, KiHae, KangTeuk_ or what have you _,_ that’s all alright, but when the cameras are off and EunHae becomes ‘ _DongHae and HyukJae_ ’ it’s suddenly a _topic._ A forbidden one, at that. A _dangerous_ one.

HyukJae doesn’t want to be a topic. Much less one that can be so damaging.

That doesn’t stop his dreams that night, where he revisits the whole scenario except that in this version DongHae and he are alone and instead of just pecking gingerly they devour each other’s mouths without a drop of hesitation.

HyukJae doesn’t talk about it, of course. Like he said, he doesn’t want it to become a _topic._

Plus, wouldn’t it be awkward if everyone found out that he sometimes dreams about kissing the life out of his bandmate, then pressing his naked body against his mattress and then—?

Well, some things are just private.


	4. Mischief (On a Date)

DongHae sometimes feels guilt, hot and suffocating. Not _all_ the time, but sometimes. Like when they all get together and talk about success and partnership and being thirteen as one forever. He knows it’s risky, he _knows_ it’s considered wrong (he can’t bring himself to agree with that, though), but he can’t—it’s not like he has a _choice_. He’s in love—well, that hasn’t been said out-loud yet, but DongHae suspects he’s been in love since he was a gangly poorly-dyed trainee.

It’s late, everyone’s soundly sleeping; an occurrence so rare HyukJae just _had_ to text DongHae to tell him they should have a small date. Of course, there is nowhere two famous idols can go to at three A.M. in the morning without raising suspicion—or at any other time, for that matter.

But they are nothing if not resourceful, and so ten minutes later they are in the backseat of HyukJae’s car, eating leftover mocha bread and drinking tea from SungMin’s thermos. Sure, the parking lot has cameras, but it’s not unusual for idols to wander around the building. As long as they don’t actually go _outside_ , it should be fine. The windows are tinted, anyway.

After ‘dinner’, DongHae, always the cuddle whore, ends up with his head on HyukJae’s lap while the latter cards his fingers through his hair. They’ve been dating for around two months—maybe three? (It’s hard to keep track when your days blend together in fast flashes of promotions and concerts and what have you…) And anyhow, it has been _great._

Their dates are nothing short of _lame._ They sit around in HyukJae’s car or watch movies in the living room when they can (no one questions if they hug or sit around together, after all, they all do it; although the _fact_ of pretending is uncomfortable), but for them, it’s more than enough. They are _lucky_ just by being able to spend time together. And as they have nothing more than these short stolen moments, they have made it their mission to enjoy them the most they can.

DongHae lifts his head to reach Hyukjae’s mouth and HyukJae retaliates by straining his neck to kiss him more fully. They giggle against the other’s lips, feeling like little kids who steal the good cookies from the back of the cabinet. When they are together, only the two of them, it seems so _harmless._ How could something as pure and intense as the way they feel for each other be so dangerous?

The kiss gets a little heated. DongHae makes a soft sound from the back of his throat, reaching for the back of HyukJae’s neck to pull him closer. He licks HyukJae’s lips and tugs the lower one softly, teasingly. When they break apart their breath is ragged, their lips parted and curved upwards with hints of smiles.

Yes, this is enough.

But DongHae sometimes wonders… _until when?_


	5. Backstage (Kissing)

“No, no, wait, Hae!”

They both giggle as they push through an unmarked door to a janitor closet, caught up in their tickle battle. They are getting ready for M Countdown, but since it’s the third week since their comeback, no one is nervous anymore and they get to relax more between rehearsal and the actual thing.

“We shouldn’t be here” HyukJae reminds DongHae as the brunette backs him against a shelf.

DongHae quirks up an eyebrow, smirking challengingly. “Oh, why’s that?”

“We’re already dressed for the presentation. We can’t ruin the outfits… or our makeup.”

DongHae pouts, then smiles mischievously _and then_ licks a wet stripe from HyukJae’s neck through his cheek to the corner of his eye. It’s nothing even remotely close to sexy. On the contrary, it’s meant to be playfully offensive, and HyukJae ducks with a face of faked disgust.

“Ohhh, cordi-noonas are going to kill you” HyukJae sings-songs, smiling brightly at his boyfriend.

Isn’t it weird, how smiling becomes practically a hobby when you are in love? Because he is, you know? HyukJae is completely and utterly, head-over-heels, in love. And though such thought may be scary for some people (and Hyukjae is honestly no exception), with DongHae everything seems easy, unforced. It makes HyukJae’s heart be at peace. Accept everything as it comes.

And when he _does_ freak out… Well, there’s always sweet cheery DongHae to remind him that he’ll always have enough hope and spirit for the both of them.

“Come on, live a little, yes?” DongHae smiles just as radiantly as his lover. This time is HyukJae who raises his eyebrows.

“Oh yeah?” With a swift movement he has DongHae against the shelf, his hands on the brunette’s hips, holding him close. Their mouths meet slow and hungry, their tongues rubbing against each other, licking and tasting and just _enjoying_.

“ _Mmm…_ I love your mouth, Hyukkie” DongHae mumbles, a little breathless. HyukJae chuckles.

“Well, I love everything about you” the redhead replies, kissing him again with the same intensity.

The words sink in while they lips are still locked, but none of them comment on it. HyukJae doesn’t want to be pushed, and incidentally, DongHae always knows when not to push him.

They’re a match made in heaven, right?

So who cares about freaking cordi-noonas and stylists and assistants that yell and scold them, hyungs that pull their ears or juniors that threat them to cut off their dessert rights?

Fuck them all, they don’t get to kiss DongHae the way HyukJae does.


	6. Snug (Wearing Each Other’s clothes)

DongHae would be ashamed to admit this out-loud in fear of being deemed ‘perverted’. _However,_ the truth is he rather likes the smell of HyukJae’s sheets. It smells like the freshener he sprays between the soft fabric and on the pillows every night, mixed with HyukJae’s body scent and lotion. For DongHae it’s always warm, because it’s HyukJae who uses them.

He’s contemplated stealing them inconspicuously; would HyukJae notice just a set disappeared? But it would be useless, because after the first wash they would no longer smell like HyukJae, _be HyukJae’s_. So he decides on a different target: clothes.

He reaches for a T-shirt and a pair of jeans, reveling in how nice they feel to the touch. They seem costly, which is not at all surprising—HyukJae likes expensive. He wouldn’t admit it out loud because it would seem brattish (which HyukJae is most certainly not), but since he’s making good money now and has millions of fans ready to gift him the whole world if necessary, he has subtly made known he is a man of _brands_. He likes simple modern lux, and as the promotions for their third album merged into the second world tour and then a break, he’s discovered this love also applies to fashionable high-end, hip-hop inspired clothing.

DongHae holds the garments in his arms, suddenly dreaming of wearing them snuggly, of surprising HyukJae on HyukJae’s bed wearing HyukJae’s clothes and begging HyukJae to fuck him with them still on (that’s if cleaning-obsessed-HyukJae can get over the fact of getting them dirty, anyway).

Except, when he actually tries them on they are not at all snuggly and loose but actually fit him rather tightly—not in a stuffed kind of way, just right and fitted. He should have known: HyukJae is so skinny sometimes he seems like he might break, there is no way he’d have clothes that are _loose_ by DongHae’s body’s standards.

Well, this kind of puts a damper on his fantasy.

He’s still looking at himself on the mirror with struggling feelings of disappointment and awe (because let’s admit it, he looks _fucking awesome_ in these) when HyukJae enters, looking nonchalant and distracted carrying a basket filled with his dry laundry.

When the redhead discovers his boyfriend in his room he stops and stares at DongHae with a blank expression, not looking angry but rather… wondering.

“I was just… uh…” DongHae rubs the back of his neck, embarrassed. _Then_ he notices what _HyukJae_ is wearing. “Wait, is that mine?” He raises an eyebrow, taking in the sight of HyukJae wearing wide sweatpants that barely dangle from his hips and a huge worn-out sweatshirt that DongHae _definitely_ recognizes as one of his favorites.

HyukJae stares down at himself and then shrugs. He acts like it’s no big deal, but the faint flush on his cheeks is enough of a telltale. “Um…yeah?”

DongHae’s eyes darken with lust, and he licks his lips temptingly while an unsuspecting HyukJae just stares at him, clueless.

Well, this is not a bad option, either.

_Not._

_At._

_All._

 


	7. We are! (Cosplaying)

DongHae’s favorite thing about being an idol is without any doubt, concerts. Being able to have a blast for two to four hours with all the screaming and cheering and your best friends is the best sensation in the whole world. Sure, touring is demanding and the first times they’d all been fainting and getting sick afterwards, but after five years, they’ve gotten the hang of it.

They are stronger now, older, better people and better artists, and even though they have a lot of people to miss—YoungWoon hyung, for example— they have been resilient enough to put on this amazing Super Show for their fans.

So as the popular dance songs and the romantic ballads give way for DongHae’s favorite part of any concert: the goofy ‘let’s play with the fans’ one, DongHae feels on top of the world once again, the tiredness numbed under all the mind-blowing adrenaline.

They are running and laughing and singing when suddenly SiWon approaches them, pointing at two hats that DongHae knows quite well from HyukJae’s endless chattering. The first is a pink reindeer one, the other a simple straw one; they unmistakably belong to One Piece’s Chopper and Luffy, respectively.

HyukJae’s eyes light up with emotion as he immediately puts the hat on. He spins and says “Look Hae, I’m Luffy!” He smile is so bright and wide that DongHae fondly thinks _yes, you’re are._

The brunette decides to wear the Chopper one, and they laugh and dance around while they try to get their lines correctly—which is harder than it seems.

DongHae runs to hug HyukJae from behind and EunHae fans go wild with cheers, HyukJae just laughing it off as he always does. As always they do fanservice, DongHae feels a bit weird about it. It’s kind of like acting, but it’s actually not? It’s leading on fans to believe there’s something between them while at the same time making clear that there’s not… except that _there is_ … Well, it’s a bit of a mind-fuck.

It doesn’t matter however, because when he sees HyukJae saying hi to the fans, singing, rapping, dancing and fooling around with other members, his smile dazzling from utter happiness, he knows it’s a secret worth keeping.

Even if he has to wait for _hours_ until they are alone in HyukJae’s bedroom to kiss the breath out of him.


	8. Sappy (Shopping)

It’s no secret that DongHae is a fucking sap. He not only gets touched with ballads, cries at movies (and everywhere else, for that matter) but he also has wild dreams about walking with HyukJae along the beach, hand in hand, laughing and sharing and kissing, soft jazz melody coming out of nowhere while the breeze stylishly brushes their hair. It’s a near impossible fantasy, even if they weren’t idols—but hey, a guy can dream right?

It’s no secret that HyukJae is a _reluctant_ sap. He is a crybaby, but he puts all his might in denying it—to no use, truth be told. If it weren’t so cute, it’d be fucking irritating. However, he does have a hard time being _romantic._ Especially with DongHae, because he’s a _guy,_ and HyukJae feels awkwardly out of place when he tries to do the same things he would have done with a girlfriend _._ He doesn’t want to emasculate DongHae, or make their relationship seem _ridiculous_ , or something.

But the thing is DongHae _is_ a romantic person, and he _wants_ HyukJae to be romantic as well. He wants them to be sappy and cheesy when they are, for example, tangled together in HyukJae’s bed, even if only to make up for all the other time when they have to pretend they are nothing more than best friends.

Anyhow, DongHae is nothing if not persistent, and throughout the years he’s made his job to break HyukJae’s shame barrier with smooch kisses, whispered sweet-nothings, lovely ear bites and pecks on the cheek. He still manages to make HyukJae blush every single time, but at least he’s stop shoving him away and instead embraces whatever affection DongHae might want to shower him with.

Perhaps applying this tactic in a deserted airport store isn’t exactly the best of ideas, though, because HyukJae seems rather scandalized when DongHae leans in to say how cute he looks with jet-lag eyes (which the former thinks is total bullshit, but for DongHae is one hundred percent true).

“Someone might see” he scolds.

“Sorry” DongHae pouts, but he’s soon distracted by a white leather backpack hanging from a rack. “Look at it, it’s beautiful! A little expensive, but it looks resistant.”

“Yeah, it’s cool. I’ll buy it right now” the older of the two says, taking the backpack from DongHae who frowns deeply, quite resembling a befuddled deer.

“But I want it for myself! You have a shitload of designer bags!” DongHae accuses.

“You’re exaggerating. Plus, it’s my money and I can do what I want with it.”

“But it’s stupid if we have the exact same bag, they’ll get mixed all the freaking time! And _I_ saw it first!”

HyukJae ponders this for about a minute before he takes the bag next to the one DongHae has, the same model but a different color: a really deep shade of brown. He eyes it critically, then shrugs and says, “Alright, so I’ll get both of them and give the white one to you, it’ll be my gift.”

DongHae’s eyes light up and he practically jumps on HyukJae, hugging the breath out of him. “Really?!”

HyukJae gently pushes him away, blushing to the tip of his ears.

“Yeah. It’ll be like a couple thingy or whatever.”

DongHae freezes at that. HyukJae rarely uses words like _couple, boyfriend_ or _lovers_ for them, because they aren’t necessary (seriously, who are they going to tell that _he’s my boyfriend_ , or things of the sort), and even though he does call DongHae pet names occasionally, the casualness and comfort with which these words were uttered give DongHae warm thrills.

He goes to pay for them with a beaming DongHae on his tail, and when they exit the store with the backpacks in their arms DongHae is about to melt from sweetness.

Right now he’d like to kiss HyukJae, to hug him soulfully and cuddle him comfortably, maybe even harmlessly slide his hands under his T-shirt because HyukJae’s skin is always better than clothing, no matter how expensive.

He can’t, though. So this time he has to settle for squeezing HyukJae’s hand and sliding an arm over his shoulders jokingly, as if it is just a bro thing—not a _couple thingy._

_Never mind_ , he thinks, because one day he’ll be able to kiss HyukJae, to hug him soulfully, to cuddle him comfortably, all under the sunlight in the middle of the busiest Seoul street and nobody will give a flying fuck.

…Except for EunHae fangirls, maybe.


	9. Truth (Hanging out With Friends)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit "angsty" (not reaaally, but compared to the fluffiness of the others), just fiy :)

_Stupid. You’re so fucking stupid_ , it’s the only thing DongHae can think at the moment, having all the other’s eyes on him, on _them_.

It started as a fun night, all of them chilling on one of those rare evenings where they all had clean schedules. Even SiWon had come down to the apartment to chill. They were drinking, laughing, singing, chatting, and suddenly DongHae stood up and asked if anyone needed anything. HyukJae said he’ll have a bit more of soju, please and DongHae casually replied “sure baby” and then _leaned in to kiss him on the mouth._

Everyone froze, them included. It wasn’t planned, it was just muscle memory kicked into action; it just… slipped. _DongHae_ just slipped. And now everything is weird and awkward and _screwed._ And it’s his fault.

JungSu stands up, hitting the table harshly in the process and not caring one bit. He eyes them coldly, his breath ragged with shocked anger, “We have not fought _so_ hard to get _this_ far so you two can ruin it over a stupid whim!”

DongHae flinches at the wording. He’s horrified that one of the dearest person in his life, or _anyone_ for that matter, would refer to HyukJae’s and his relationship as a _whim._ After all they’d been through, after all they’ve shared… _How could_ anyone _think it’s just a caprice?_

He’s so hurt that he doesn’t even notice JungSu leaving, followed by HeeChul who didn’t even spare them a second glance—probably because for him it isn’t a big deal at all and he’s just going to calm JungSu down. If someone can do that, it’s HeeChul hyung.

ShinDong and SiWon look uncomfortable—but everyone knows it’s for a completely different reason than JungSu hyung, who only thinks about Super Junior and its well-being, and so HyukJae snaps at them to just go if they find it so weird. 

Saddest part is… they do.

The rest is silent for a minute and it soon becomes too unbearable, so RyeoWook and JongWoon take that as their cue to leave. They don’t say anything, good or bad. They don’t give them dirty looks, or sympathetic stares… They just seem as if they don’t know how to feel yet.

Only two and counting, DongHae thinks

“Hey, it doesn’t matter if you like dick, you’re still _you_ ” KyuHyun tactlessly says, shrugging and standing up. “Cheer up, old men.” He stretches a bit, bids them goodnight and disappears behind his door.

The couple looks at SungMin, the only one left in the living room, staring off at the forgotten beer and soju bottles. It’s as if everything had turned in just a minute, with only a small gesture. Their group is different; their lives are different, because they all now know a secret that could destroy their dreams. But hey, how _bad_ could it really be? Aren’t they famous already? Don’t they have a strong enough fanbase?

SungMin coughs to get their attention, then approaches them to pat them on the back.

“Look. I support you. If you want to be together, that’s alright. It’s just… surprising, I guess? JungSu hyung is not mad at _you_ , he’s just worried, you know? For Super Junior’s future. Especially since YoungWoon hyung’s thing…” he pauses, sighs. “He’ll come around, they all will. And then we’ll figure how to move on from there together.”

“Thanks, SungMinnie” HyukJae whispers, smiling weakly. He can’t show it; he’s too despaired for that, but he’s so amazingly grateful to his friend, the one that after all these years still sticks to him, stands by him.

So once again it’s only HyukJae and DongHae, just the both of them.

“Do you think it’s true? That they’ll come around?”

“I don’t know” says HyukJae honestly. He pulls DongHae’s arm slightly and the younger gets the message, letting himself fall into the other’s embrace. “I can’t promise you that they will. It’s not in my power.”

DongHae nods but still looks rather saddened, so HyukJae kisses his temple and continues. “Listen to me. It’s not- it’s not our problem… If they can’t accept it, I mean. It’s only their concern if it affects Super Junior, and we won’t let that happen, right?”

“Yeah… But… I just wish there was something we could do, you know?”

“Well… We can kiss, then go to sleep together— _actually_ , sleep by the way, wake up, try to act normally and wait for them to react. That sounds okay to you? Hmm?” he buries his face in DongHae’s neck and inhales deeply, and DongHae can’t help but smile, even if it’s subtly so.

“Yeah, let’s do that. _Especially_ the kissing part” they laugh gingerly and lock their lips in a slow, tender kiss.

It’s okay.

They’ll be okay.


	10. Under the Sea (With Animal Ears)

When he comes home after a particularly tiring Sukira program, he finds DongHae in his room, curled up on his bed against the wall, inexplicably wearing the huge Nemo headpiece he got from Super Show 2. DongHae is one of the few who kept it, HyukJae as hell wouldn’t store his huge anchovy one all these years. Space in Seoul is precious, dammit! He blinks twice and thrice, thinks he’s too tired for this right now and then feels a pang of guilt for it.

He walks up to DongHae, kneels in front of him and gently asks what’s up. As he gets no response, he carefully lifts DongHae’s face and caresses his cheeks tenderly, trying to disguise how much he just wants to close his eyes and drift off to sleep.

“Sad” DongHae mumbles, pouting. His eyes are bloodshot, his face reddish and pale at the same time, and HyukJae thinks that worry is not an emotion that will ever suit his boyfriend’s face. “How was _your_ day?”

HyukJae opens his mouth to reply but stops mid-breath. He doesn’t want to bum DongHae out even more, telling him how JungSu was polite and funny, as always, but he didn’t refer to _the topic_ in any way and wouldn’t actually talk to HyukJae unless it was _absolutely_ necessary. He doesn’t want to depress his boyfriend even more by reminding him that one of the most important paternal figures in their lives is shutting them out like this, and he most certainly doesn’t want to explain how that makes him feel.

So he just settles for a nonchalant _okay,_ and sits next to DongHae who automatically snuggles against him, HyukJae’s arm surrounding his shoulders so naturally they instantly feel calm washing over them like a balm.

“So… why the hat?”

DongHae shrugs.

“I was just… remembering when we all wore them. We were so happy. We had water guns and EunHae banners and we pretended to kiss, remember?” HyukJae nods, chuckling a little. In retrospective it hadn’t happened _that_ long ago, but with the lightening-like life they lead everything past a year feels _ages_ away. “Our little game seemed so harmless back then… Nobody knew what we actually were- _are._ And it was so _safe._ Now it’s all… weird.”

“You know what’s weird? Lee DongHae being existential and using big words, _that’s_ weird!” HyukJae flings himself onto DongHae, tickling him until he bursts into laughter and there are no dark shades cross his face anymore.

When DongHae seems like he’s going to run out of breath from the tickling, HyukJae finally stops. He doesn’t, however, step away from DongHae, hugging the latter closer instead. They need this; the closeness, the safety. After all these years, they are still each other’s lifeline.

He buries his face in the warm crook of DongHae’s neck and inhales deeply, smiling to himself when DongHae shivers. He traces the younger’s side with the tip of his fingers, drawing patterns only he knows exist. “Look. When it’s out there, it’s out of our hands. We have to hide, think about what could happen to us. But here? Here it’s us. Us, under the sea... where nothing else can touch us. Just you and me.” DongHae turns in his arms, the Nemo hat twisting the bed covers.

“Under the sea…?” DongHae repeats, twisting his tongue around the corny words. He ponders this for a minute, smiling to himself. HyukJae always gets him to feel eternally young and very mature at the same time. He always feels totally _DongHae_ when he’s with HyukJae, real, _authentic_ , and it’s the best emotion in the whole world.  “Yes. Just us. Except…”

He smiles mischievously, this very DongHae-ish glint in his eyes, and HyukJae _knows_ he’s planning something. Still, he internally sighs in relief. If DongHae’s coming back to himself, all the lost hours of sleep in the world are worth it.

“Wait, wait Hae, no!” he screams when DongHae launches on top of him, getting back at him for the previous tickling session with an even more forceful vendetta.

“Hey, lovebirds!” JungSu suddenly barks from behind the door, knocking on it forcefully. They both jump apart immediately just in time to see their hyung’s head pop in from the crack between the door and its frame. “I need to talk to you both. Is it…? Can I come in?”

They stare at each other, dumbfounded, and then at JungSu hyung. His expression is a little hesitant, a little amused, a little scornful, but most of all it’s soft, accepting.

And they know, they know right then, that it’s _that_ moment—that moment where they are going to talk about it, are going to solve it, and—and it’s going to be alright.

_It’s going to be alright._


	11. Cute is the New Sexy (Wearing Kigurumis)

 DongHae is cute. Everyone knows that. He’s like a freaking Labrador puppy.

Lately DongHae’s been trying to convince everyone that he’s this sort of macho grownup—which he can be, sometimes, as HyukJae is quite aware. Nonetheless he can’t deny the part of him that makes everyone want to hug him like a teddy bear.

And the little devil _knows_ it. He knows exactly how to use his adorability to his advantage and get whatever he wants.

But that’s not the worst part.

The _worst_ part is that half the time—the half he isn’t coaxing HyukJae into doing something for him— he isn’t even _aware_ of how cute he’s actually being.

How every time he laughs or puffs his cheeks or makes a dorky face HyukJae wants to kiss him and hug him and…

_SO._

One evening HyukJae comes back to the dorm after some random variety show recording to find DongHae on his bed (no news there), with huge headphones on and completely focused on whatever he’s doing on HyukJae’s laptop—probably mixing a song or watching stupid dog videos on YouTube.

None of that is out of the ordinary, except that tonight his boyfriend is wearing one of those silly giraffe kigurumis some fans had given them during a Super Show much to RyeoWook’s bliss—where DongHae keeps all his SS stolen stuff HyukJae doesn’t want to know.

But it’s not just that. The kigurumi is sloppily buttoned up to his chest only, and so the edges hang low from his shoulders exposing his clavicles. He’s fresh from the shower, his hair still damp; his skin soft and nicely flushed from the heat of the shower. He looks relaxed and nonchalant and somewhat innocent and _really_ alluring and HyukJae just… growls.  

HyukJae fucking _growls._

DongHae of course, doesn’t notice. He’s flaky like that. The earphones don’t help either.

HyukJae drops his bag onto the floor, closes the door, _locks it,_ walks towards DongHae and snatches the laptop from him, earphones included.

DongHae looks consternated for a minute. “Hey! What was that about?” he pouts, giving HyukJae his full-power doe eyes.

“I wanted to say hello to you.”

“Well, couldn’t you tap my shoulder like a normal being?”

HyukJae smirks at this. He grabs DongHae’s face between his hands and kisses him—kisses him _good;_ hard, all lips and demanding tongue, his hands cupping DongHae’s jaw and neck, drawing him closer.

When they break apart DongHae is nearly panting. He looks over at his boyfriend, flushed and surprised.

“Oh? Hello to you too” he chuckles, latching his arms around HyukJae’s neck. “What’s gotten into you?”

“Oh, I don’t know” the older mumbles, licking his lower lip while tracing his index finger up and down the edge of the soft kigurumi. He looks at DongHae intently, and something in his boyfriends clicks.

“Oh.” DongHae smiles a bit dazed but looking rather pleased. “This? Really?”

The _best_ part is, DongHae gets it. Gets what he does to HyukJae sometimes when he’s _just too damn cute_. Fuckable-y cute, as HyukJae would say.

HyukJae shrugs. “It’s nice.”

“Oh. Well then, come here, _hyung”_ he purrs, pulling HyukJae into another kiss and on top of him over the bed for… comfort.

So. 

DongHae is cute.

He’s also sexy as hell and HyukJae won’t ever get enough of him.


	12. Always Late (Making Out)

Things have changed between them.

Not in a bad way—for them, however if you asked the other members they’d tell you they are not very impressed with this switch.

Not that it matters, though, because after all the shit they’d been through, they deserve it.

The truth is that after more than thirteen years of an adorable friendship and more than six of a hidden romantic relationship, they have finally caught a break.

Now that everybody knows, they can actually act like a couple around the members (well, not  _all_ of them, but most of the group is alright with it once they’d agreed to keep it clean and within the apartment’s walls) thus making them enter into a bit of a… honeymoon phase.

Having always had to be careful not to get caught and having known each other for so long beforehand, their relationship had felt very grown up from the beginning. The easiness and dream-like shade that most relationships have at the beginning had skipped them. Now, it’s like they are reliving the beginning, doing it right this time.

Which has inevitably led into quite a lot of sneaking around to grope, make out and dry hump each other like teenagers every chance they get.

Which nobody would actually mind if it wasn’t having this impact in the _whole timing_ on the group schedule. Moving around a group of nine idols altogether with managers and staff is not exactly easy, much less if there are always two members that are constantly missing and delaying every-fucking-thing. And so the irritation has become palpable to every single member.

Like this morning for example, in which HyukJae and DongHae have decided to shower together (supposedly to save up water—but come on who are they kidding?) and they’d ended up making out against the door, their legs intertwined, their mouths devouring each other, their hands touching all over.

And then there’s SungMin, who’s sleep deprived and in a hurry to get to a recording and waiting outside the door for HyukJae to stop hogging the bathroom and stick to the freaking schedule—that’s what is fucking for!

“Oh my fucking—I swear to _God_ Lee HyukJae that if the reason you’re taking THIS much time in there is because you’re with DongHae I’m going to…”

Finally the door opens, HyukJae’s head sneaking between the edge of the door and the frame. He looks _flushed_ , his lips red and swollen, his eyes glazed with excitement, and SungMin wants to murder him.

“What do I need to do to buy your shower time?”

SungMin stares at him with cold yet scolding anger, his face showing no impression at all.

“Nothing. I _need_ to shower, HyukJae.”

“ _Hyukkie…”_ SungMin hears a whisper behind the blonde, barely audible to him, and HyukJae bites his lower lip, sparing an apologetic glance to his friend.

“Sorry, just ten minutes.”

And then he shuts the door to SungMin’s face, which scrunches up in a mix of anger and disgust.

The _nerve._

“YOU FUCKER SON OF A BITCH I AM GOING TO SMOTHER YOU IN YOUR SLEEP WITH A PILLOW AND THROW YOUR BODY INTO A DITCH WHERE WORMS WILL DEVOUR IT AND NOBODY WILL EVER FIND IT!”

As previously stated, honeymoon face, makes them all be always late.


	13. Melt (Eating Ice Cream)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know I haven't posted a new chapter in a while, but you know... Life happens. Luckily I'll be able to continue steadily and finish this soon :) Also, this is a bit... PG-15+ (?) Not nearly R (by my standards) but I don't want any complaints, so I warn just in case(?)

The thing is… DongHae is fun. And creative.

He has this sparkle inside him; he likes dynamic stuff, novelty, new experiences. He puts his spirits in everything he does…

And that of course includes HyukJae.

Like when they get to go grocery shopping (a whim that they don’t get away with unless manager hyung is very, _really_ happy) and DongHae finds a new crème brûlée-flavored ice cream and takes it in his hands with sparking eyes.

“Oh my God this looks _too_ good Hyukkie!” DongHae says, and HyukJae scoots over his shoulder to check the yellow package. It’s nothing out of the ordinary: rectangular, yellow, _frozen._ He looks back at DongHae, unimpressed.

“So buy it, what’s the big deal?”

DongHae quiets down for a minute, and thinks.

“It’s just…” he holds his tongue between his teeth, the universal DongHae-sign for hesitance. “I’ve thought of something.”

HyukJae raises his eyebrows, tilting his head in a silent question.

“This seems so good I’d like to lick it off your lips, your neck, your nipples, your tummy… and maybe your cock; we’ll see how that goes.”

HyukJae stares in bewilderment. At first he can’t process it; DongHae says the words so casually, almost as if he’s reading their daily schedules aloud, and it never ceases to amaze HyukJae how open and earnest and shameless his boyfriend can be. It makes his heart beat wildly.

_Then_ the words start to sink in and HyukJae’s mouth drops open, his body heating up at an astonishing speed…

…Which is how he ends up on his bed, on his back, with DongHae on top of him, all over him, so turned on and desperate he has to bite his lower lip until it bleeds to keep his moans down.

DongHae’s tongue is skittish and hot and melts the ice cream against HyukJae’s body with a skill they’ve learnt together, and HyukJae feels his skin is melting with the motions. The younger tongues his hipbone and looks up at him, his eyes twinkling mischievously. His lips are swollen and glistening with ice cream and saliva and he smirks, slithering his hands all over HyukJae’s body. He’s surely sticky, but DongHae doesn’t mind getting dirty, pun _so_ intended.   

Finally, he takes a bit of the ice cream between his fingers and grabs HyukJae, jerking him off a few times before going down on him with no hesitance, working him with his throat and tongue and cheeks and _fuck_ has DongHae learnt how to multitask.

“This… _Shit._ This was a… _great_ idea, Hae” HyukJae all but sighs, arching his back and doing the impossible to hold his hips still.

DongHae’s ideas can be crazy, even get them into trouble sometimes…

…but oh Lord, bless him for the ones that lead to mind-blowing blowjobs that leave HyukJae light-headed, shaking and tingling all over, because of those he’ll most _certainly_ never get tired.


	14. Hey, Pretty Baby (In a Different Clothing Style)

HyukJae is a bit of a bitch.

Not in the slut way (actually, HyukJae is so picky with whom he touches he would be physically unable to be _that_ kind of a slut even if he wanted to), but in the hey-look-at-how-hot-I-am way. It has a little to do with his dancer side and a lot to do with the fact that he’d been called ugly since teenage and now he’s finally at the top of every hottie list and has thousands of females (and plenty of males) screaming for dear life every time he so much as lifts his shirt.

Of course to DongHae that’s a load of bullshit; HyukJae’s always been the hottest guy on earth. The fact others took so long to appreciate it it’s their fucking problem. Nonetheless it’s nice to see HyukJae so sure and confident—the fact that so many people want him but only DongHae can have him is but a plus.

The first time DongHae noticed how much the teasing was for HyukJae’s own sake rather than the fans, was actually during Super Show 2. They did F(x)’s Chu~ in a cutesy humorous way, but when HyukJae approached the fans in those _short_ shorts and leggings, he always did this sort of sexy dance where he touched his body in the most flirty of ways.

It took but a couple of more shows to grasp that it was pathologic, a habit there to stay.

Not that DongHae’s complaining.

Not. At. All.

So when HyukJae and ShinDong pitched in the idea of a dance special using Harlem Shake, DongHae was all for it. The choreo is provocative and exciting and they enjoy every bit of constructing it.

He knows what the dance would look like, so he isn’t worried at all, except that when they are checking the costumes for Super Show 5 and the styling noonas present the Harlem Shake outfits there’s something white and fluffy and so, _so_ slutty that has HyukJae’s name written all over it.

HyukJae tips his head and tries it on, deciding to take it off _along with his T-shirt_ almost immediately. When he puts it back on it is like something’s been switched on; he revels in his own reflection on the mirror and smirks, trying a few dance moves to check the level of mobility of the garment before nodding approvingly.

“So we could put some tattoos or something there, spice it up a little. What do you think?” the noona says, staring at HyukJae with clinically professional eye.

It sparkles _something_ in DongHae as well, because HyukJae looks so sexy and appealing and in control at the same time, he has to count to a hundred backwards and remind himself ten times that he’s in a room full of people (members included) not to pounce on him.

 

“Hey” DongHae later says when they were back in the apartment, tucked into each other on the couch, watching some non-descript romance movie of the kind DongHae likes. “Do you think, after the tour and such… you could maybe sneak out you Harlem Shake outfit? You know… to… uhm… _play?”_

HyukJae stares at him with a raised eyebrow, feigning confusion.

But his fucking pleased (and teasing) grin says it all.

And DongHae can’t do much more than mentally curse him and then kiss the hell out of him.


	15. If I were a… Girl? (Gender-swapped)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a bit longer. I don’t think anybody is going to complain about THAT. But oh well, disclaimers apply. We’re also halfway through, so I thought doing something ‘special’ would be nice :)

DongHae doesn’t consider himself a girly man— _especially_ bearing in mind how he’s shared dorms with HeeChul, SungMin and RyeoWook, and how he’s really close to YunHo who back in the day didn’t go anywhere with JaeJoong tagging along (and only God knows how much part girl that dude is).

So no, DongHae doesn’t see himself as girly. He doesn’t see himself as _manly_ either—not like SiWon or YoungWoon-hyung, anyway. He tries, he boasts about being so, but in his inner core he knows his appeal goes along the lines of ‘cute flower boy next door’. And he’s okay with it; he’s made his peace with everything above.

Nonetheless, sometimes when he’s in China and can’t sleep, he watches reruns of variety shows HyukJae’s been in (he’s got a whole external memory dedicated to those) and he sees HyukJae flirting and talking about how to be smooth and how much of a womanizer he is and something comes to his mind. HyukJae _does_ like girls. Not that DongHae is worried he’s gonna cheat on him or something—HyukJae may like girls, but he _loves_ DongHae and there’s no contest there.

But the point still stands. HyukJae likes girls. And DongHae sometimes wonders.

 

 

She puts a brown lock behind her ear, careful not to spoil her curls, for which she spent two extra hours that morning in front of the mirror. Her whole outfit is planned as well: she’s wearing a baby pink lace summer dress and sandals that add a few extra inches to her stance. She’s also wearing a summer hat and glasses for discretion: sneaking into an idol’s apartment constantly guarded by fans isn’t easy—but there’re ways, there are _always_ ways, and DongHae’s become an expert in the six months she’s been dating HyukJae.

She tugs on her lower lip nervously as she executes a perfect version of their “secret knock” on the door. The leader of the band opens after a while, smiling brightly.

“Little DongHae! So good to see you, my pretty dongsaeng” JungSu oppa greets, with the usual gentleman-y way he treats all women.

“Hey, oppa. How are you doing?”

“Oh, just fine. _You_ look like a doll, by the way.”

DongHae blushes, lowering her gaze before muttering a bashful _thank you, oppa._ Followed by a _where is HyukJae, oppa?_

“Oh, that lazy-ass. In the room. _As always._ ”

DongHae smiles and nods, going through the halls she already knows so well and entering the impossibly tidy bedroom that has become her second home. There she finds a slim redheaded woman lying on her bed, wearing nothing but a royal blue Victoria’s Secret bra and booty shorts. Oh, her excuses, she’s also wearing black Beats Studio, which DongHae yanks directly from her short pixie hair in one quick motion.

“You aren’t ready? SERIOUSLY? HyukJae-ah!” she screams, feeling like tearing her girlfriend’s head apart from her body, especially because the woman barely looks up from her position. She looks quite confused with sleep, and that only sparks DongHae’s rage. “You fucking cunt! You’ll see!” she yells, going for the kill: HyukJae’s dresser. She takes all the creams and bottles and pettily mixes them around, letting the ones in the most resistant packages drop and bounce on the floor. “You… Don’t… Joke… Around… With me!

HyukJae can’t take three seconds without sitting up on the bed and shouting. “Hey, you’re messing my order, stop!”

Oh, _now_ she reacts, the OCD freak.

DongHae bares her teeth, resembling very much a cheetah about to hunt.

“I _don’t_ care. Why do you have to _always_ do this? I wake up three hours early to be ready for our plans and when I get here you haven’t even _started_! And then you take _hours_ to get dressed because, of course, Miss HyukJae always needs to look perfect. Ugh! I hate you” the brunette says almost without breathing, by the end of which she’s tired and she just lets herself fall onto her girlfriend’s bed.

HyukJae blinks a few times and then sighs, scooting over to DongHae to hug her from behind.

“Hey babe, I’m sorry, okay?” she rests her chin on DongHae’s elbow, circling her body with her arms and squeezing tenderly. “How…” she kisses the base of DongHae’s soft and warm neck, feeling her tremble in her arms, “can I… make it up… to you? Hmm, you smell so nice, by the way.”

“Seriously? _Now?!_ ” DongHae barks out, but there’s a slight hitch in her breath and when HyukJae gently turns her face to kiss her, her mouth is ready and willing.

“I’ll make it real good for you, babe” HyukJae says, smirking as she tugs DongHae’s lithe body towards the mattress, changing their positions so she’s on top of the brunette.

 

 

He wakes up abruptly but quietly, as if his consciousness was suddenly re-implanted within him. He looks around but everything is dark, and he tries to turn and recognize his surroundings. Except that when he does, he clashes with a very asleep HyukJae. Then it all comes back to him: he’s in China, HyukJae joins him now; he’s a part of SJ M too. They are sleeping, they have to wake up in three hours, everything is normal. It’s okay.

Then another thought crosses his mind.

“HyukJae, stay still!” he says and then just starts… _grabbing._

HyukJae wakes up around the third chest squeeze and instead of freaking out like every other person would, he promptly grabs DongHae’s wrists and keeps him still. “Ouch! Hae, what the fuck?”  He looks half concerned half amused, because weird things happen around DongHae all the time and he’s sort of… ninety percent immune already.

“Sorry. I was… having a weird dream. I just wanted to check that everything is… in place, you know?”

Because DongHae is not like HyukJae; he doesn’t _like_ girls. Well, he likes them as friends, he likes BoA and Amber, for example, but he doesn’t… _like-like_ them. He likes HyukJae, all sharp angles and grave voice and… okay, his cock as well, alright? So he needs to make sure that HyukJae is still _HyukJae._

HyukJae sighs and sits up, turning on the closest lamp and grabbing a water bottle they always keep on the nightstand. “Us being girls again?”

“Yeah, that one.”

HyukJae twists his mouth thoughtfully and then sighs again, leaving his water bottle at the side and lying to face DongHae better.

“Look, Hae, I’ve already told you. You’re DongHae. I don’t need anything else from you but you, get it?”

“But… would you like me better as a girl? Would you like me better any way else? Sometimes I feel like it would be so much easier for you, you know?” he mutters, feeling guilty because deep inside he knows he’s not being fair to HyukJae; he’s never expressed anything of the sort.

HyukJae considers this for a moment, truly thinking about what his boyfriend is talking. “Well… honestly, I don’t know. Because then you wouldn’t _be_ DongHae. Part of you is being a man, or an eternal boy, actually” he chuckles tenderly at this, and then traces his hand up and down DongHae’s arm, then up his shoulders, to his face. “I _honestly_ want you. I love _you._ And that is enough. So stop thinking stupid things, alright?”

HyukJae’s face is turning red now because he’s one of the least vocal people about his feelings in the world, and having to reassure DongHae by declaring his helpless love is _definitely not_ within his comfort zone.

“What?” he chirps when DongHae starts smiling dumbly at him, _beaming,_ as if his whole face has been lit up from the inside. DongHae just shakes his head and launches forward to kiss him, shutting down any protest the older may have.

“Nothing. You’re just too cute, Hyukkie-yah.”


	16. Hurry (During their Morning Ritual(s))

DongHae _loves_ pampering HyukJae, smoldering him with affection because even if HyukJae gets embarrassed by admitting it, he loves it just as well.

So every morning DongHae wakes up first to silently watch HyukJae sleep. He loves seeing how his expression sometimes changes from peaceful to something else depending on what he’s dreaming about, later acquiring an alert feature that means he’s waking up.

HyukJae stirs into consciousness and smiles calmly as he registers his boyfriend’s presence. Their eyes meet and then their mouths follow, whispering endearments and soft good mornings into each other’s lips.

After lazy yet hot and dreamy morning sex, DongHae goes to make breakfast for both of them. The menu varies from day to day, but coffee is always a must.

They eat in bed, feeding each other stupidly, in a way that’s only okay when you actually are a part of the couple; otherwise it’d seem disgusting. Of course DongHae and HyukJae are so far gone by now they don’t even notice; they are still young and still so madly in love as they were the time they shared their first kiss.

They eat, talk, listen to some music and check the industry news before making their way to the bathroom, sharing a steamy and cozy shower, washing each other’s hairs and backs.

It’s a mellow and chill routine, a thing they’ve made their own after so many years together…

 

—Yeah, they  _wish._

Usually, their "mornings" (if anything prior to six a.m. might even be considered as such) go down like this:

 

SungMin bangs on HyukJae’s door over and over and screams: “WAKE THE FUCK UP!”

HyukJae pushes DongHae off the bed and barks: “You turned off the alarm the first time it rang, didn’t you?”

DongHae groggily snaps: “It hurt my ears, okay? And I recall you were with me yesterday chatting with JungSu hyung at four A.M.”

HyukJae grimaces but says nothing, getting up instead. They don’t even fight it off anymore; that would only take more time and they just can’t be bothered—they’re too tired, have too much on their hands.

They go into shower together to save time, but it’s the most unromantic thing ever because they are too focused on not tripping over the other in their rush to even notice the presence of a naked body next to them.

They practically run out of the shower and don’t even dry up properly before they get dressed (their clothes thoroughly mixed by now) and emerge into the living room where everyone is in the same state of sleep-deprived adrenaline rush as them. It’s just how it is during comeback periods.

“No time to eat, I packed you two some snacks” RyeoWook hastily says as he helps JongWoon with his jacket and then takes his bag from SungMin, somehow handing HyukJae the snacks in the process. It’s sort of some mother-octopus magic that only RyeoWook and JungSu have that makes them able to handle this level of stressful domesticity and not lose their minds in the process.

“Hey, have a nice day” DongHae says, right before they go out into the real world, and HyukJae smiles and leans in to peck DongHae’s mouth playfully.

“You too, Hae” he whispers before running after their teammates.

And that’s that.

It’s no French movie, but it’s their lives right now and they love them, so they manage to make it work.

The important thing with DongHae and HyukJae is: they’ll always make it work, somehow.


	17. Jam Nights (Doing Something Together)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I know, it's been so long... don't even have excuses lol Just... here it is xd warnings. fluff(?)

DongHae has never considered himself _talented_ , per se, he’d use words somewhere along _charming_ and _charismatic._ He knows he’s got a nice voice, that he dances really well, that he’s good looking and likeable, but to him, that doesn’t count as artistic talent or sensibility.

HyukJae think that’s such bullshit he refuses to even discuss it with his boyfriend—hell, DongHae is the most artistic person he knows. To HyukJae, DongHae has this magic eye and mind through which he perceives everything that is fairylike in the world. There’s no one else who can spot the beauty of residual rain in the asphalt, of rhythmic sneakers against a shiny practice room, of the way HyukJae’s hand moves when he leisurely writes down random ideas for choreos or even the way hair falls in someone’s eyes when they lean down. DongHae knows what to whisper in someone’s ears to make them smile, and the treasures that smile as if he was taking a mental picture of it. He does that with everything he likes, as if he’s saving all the things he loves inside his heart, his strong benevolent heart.

There’s no one that can see this world quite like Lee DongHae, and that’s just one of the many things that make HyukJae love him consistently every single hour of every single day in the calendar.

He also writes very beautiful lyrics, and HyukJae enjoys tuning them with him, critiquing in the best sense of the word, enhancing and composing soft romantic raps that go along with DongHae’s pastel-color sensibility of the world.

They spend long relaxed hours inside HyukJae’s room—the sacred temple of their relationship, really— or on the floor of either living room with tea or juice on their side, a laptop and small notebook to record everything that might strike their creativity at the moment.

One day, DongHae’s writing something that seems to have grabbed his attention particularly. Maybe it’s a new song, a full one, one he really believes in and wants to record and perform.  He doesn’t allow HyukJae to have a look just yet, but instead he says, “I just wished I could sing with you. Just with you. I mean, the guys are great, Suju’s great, but… you know.”

HyukJae nods, smiling softly. They both love their group; they wouldn’t abandon it for the world. But something that was both theirs would be… well, both theirs. It’s hard to explain, but when you share a bond so profound in so many ways, not just romantic or sexual, things like these become a craving—to create something, to have a space to share a bit of themselves _together,_ of what _they_ are not as individuals, but as something bigger, _better._ Because they complement each other so well, help each other grow and become better people, better artists, and they’d like to share that with their fans, show them how happy they are together, even if they can only see a little portion of the whole magnitude of their feelings.

Somehow, just the idea of it makes HyukJae’s heart swell inside his chest.

“You’ll see. One day we’ll have concerts just for the two of us, you and me… EunHyuk and DongHae” he chuckles when DongHae throws him a dirty look. “Okay, or DongHae and EunHyuk, whatever” he says, nudging him with his shoulder. “And you’ll write our lyrics. And we’ll have amazing dance routines, and…”

“And we’ll make out in front of our fans?” DongHae chirps in, seeming truly into it and HyukJae makes a totally freaked out expression that is so _priceless._

“Uhm…”

“Kidding! Duh!” DongHae laughs, leaving the notebook aside and shifting onto his side to look at HyukJae, cupping his cheek gingerly. “Although… I _do_ look forward to the day we’ll be able to kiss and nobody will bat an eyelash because it’s so damn ordinary.”

HyukJae snorts—even though he does want the same things, just the idea of DongHae being anywhere near the concept of ‘ordinary’ is quite hilarious.

“Someday” HyukJae whispers, closing his eyes and letting the warm cadence of DongHae’s soft fingers threading his hair take him somewhere else, some place happier and cozier. “Someday…”


	18. Warmth (Spooning)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EunHae in London. My poor little heart.

HyukJae is not a cuddly person. He’s not _reluctant_ to human contact, he actually likes it, especially when it comes from DongHae, but he’s not as touchy-feely as DongHae himself—then again, there’s no one in this world who’s as cuddly as Lee DongHae.

Even so, he’s got to acknowledge the fact that when everything else goes wrong and he’s sinking into a dark funk, the only person he wants to get home to is his cuddly, touchy-feely Lee DongHae.

Today’s been like that.

He’s had one of _those_ days; he’s gotten into fights with every single person that’s crossed his path and has screwed up practice more times than he cares to admit. All he wants to is get into his bed and black out… and maybe leisurely kiss his boyfriend for a couple of minutes before that.

When he crawls past the apartment door and gets to his room, DongHae is comfortably curled up under his bed’s covers, all of HyukJae’s extra pillows and stuffed animals spread over the bedroom floor. They don’t do this, crush together for the whole night, so often these days, but maybe DongHae was feeling especially lonely tonight, so it’s okay. It would never really bother HyukJae anyway.

When he puts on his pajama pants and slides in, ready to take his side, DongHae’s heat gets to him and he realizes how much he needs this, how much he needs to be next to DongHae right now, like a balm to his shitty mood.

So he hugs his boyfriend from behind, spooning him like they haven’t done in a while because it’s juvenile and overly-cheesy, but right now it feels so cozy and just _right,_ HyukJae can’t let go.

“Mmm? What’s up?” DongHae mumbles, still deep in his slumber, his body automatically moving to fit better against HyukJae’s.

“Nothing. Just go back to sleep…” HyukJae whispers into DongHae’s skin, nudging his neck intimately.

DongHae knows something’s up. Maybe it’s not something too serious, but there’s always a reason behind an overly-clingy HyukJae.  He knows not to push, though—he’s long ago learnt that when HyukJae is ready, he’ll tell. Because they trust each other. And sure, it isn’t always easy to open up to someone who you care so much about, who you want to keep on loving you, but they’ve worked on it. They’ve improved. And when they’re like this, warm and tangled together in the dark, their heartbeats and mingled breaths the only sounds, the ups and downs of their chests the only movements in the room… It feels easy, simple, natural.

“Sure?” he confirms, one more time just to be certain.

“Yeah, just a crappy day” he kisses DongHae’s cheek and tightens his hold around his waist.

“’kay” DongHae goes back to sleep immediately, and HyukJae follows soon after with a relaxed and peaceful expression on his face, the troubles of the day slipped away already.

The truth is no matter how disastrous a day, a week or a month it has been, if HyukJae is able to go to bed this contentedly next to DongHae, he’ll always manage to sleep with a smile on his lips.


	19. Suit & Tie (In Formal Wear)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THESE ARE FINALLY STARTING TO FEEL LIKE DRABBLES AGAIN!! /o/ (two+ pages is waaay too long for what this is supposed to be. even so, i don't force it. whatever comes out, it's done lol)

“You look good” DongHae whispers hotly against HyukJae’s lips. At times like this he wishes he knew how to do ties, because it’s the only thing missing form his boyfriend’s look and he’d like to be able to do stuff like this for him. HyukJae is always stylish (way more so than DongHae, to be honest), but his fashion sensibility leans more towards designer T-shirts and high-end dancer trousers, so a clean-cut form-fitted tux is always a nice change.

HyukJae smirks and steps into DongHae’s personal space, fully knowing what his smoldering look is doing to DongHae’s nerves. “You too, this trousers make your sexy ass look _amazing_ ” he says in a deep, lust-filled voice and DongHae shivers a tiny bit. In the back of his mind he knows they should be leaving for the red carpet already, but he can’t be bothered by that right now, not when their mouths are meeting in a slow yet sensual kiss, HyukJae thoroughly exploring the wet heat he already knows by heart.

DongHae groans from the back of his throat and contains the impulse of pulling HyukJae flush against him from the lapels of his jacket. They have both already been to hair and makeup, their tux already perfectly fit in place, so wrapping their arms around the other’s body while sucking face might ruin the look—might.

HyukJae sucks on his lower lip, their mouths the only part of their bodies touching because they know that the second they put their hands on each other they won’t be able to stop themselves. You’d think being idols they’d have more self-restraint, but around award season things always get extra rushed and it’s been a while—a man can only help himself so much.

The door to the dressing-room opens abruptly. Not that they notice, of course.

“Oh my God” SungMin shrieks staring at them in horror. He may be okay with his best friends being gay, but that doesn’t mean he wants to sign up for a live demonstration.

They don’t jump apart or something equally sudden—that would imply _guilt_ which is not really something they are currently feeling. In fact, DongHae bites his lip like a naughty kid who has been caught stealing a cookie, which, to be honest, is just how he feels right now.

He can’t bring himself to be mortified.

HyukJae just looks too good in formal wear.


	20. Home (Dancing)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, YOU CAN'T SAY I HAVEN'T BEEN DILLIGENT, posting a drabble every day. Of course my definition fo "day" is a bit different because it starts at 6PM and ends at like 2/4am, but hey, still counts(?) Enjoy :3

 

A lot of things have changed since they started dating; they’ve fought, grown up, even split for a couple of months, travelled, won awards, seen people they love go and return, fallen in love all over again. But even in the midst of so much confusion, there’s something that has never changed, the strongest and main constant in their lives: their love for each other, and the shared passion for dancing.

Since they saw each other dance for the first time (in what feels like _eons_ ago), they knew they could be friends just because of that passion. Sharing a dance in front of a mirror and knowing without even looking that they are in perfect beautiful synch… there’s no sensation that can even come close to how invigorating that is.

SM practice rooms are like a sanctuary to them. When they are alone in here, just chilling and not rehearsing for Super Junior, they aren’t idols who need to be clean-cut and stylish; they are goofy HyukJae and DongHae, two men that can be sweaty, have bags under their eyes, wear loose old sweats and faded T-shirts. Better yet, they don’t have to worry about their relationship being discovered or frowned upon, because in here it isn’t even about their relationship at all. It’s all about music and movement and how much like _home_ it feels.

Tonight they’ve been free-styling to a bunch of different songs, mostly American pop and R&B. They end up creating a nice fluid 50-second choreo for an Usher song that after twenty repeats leaves them panting and lying on the hardwood floor.

HyukJae is sitting with his back against the mirror while DongHae is carelessly spread across the floor, limbs twitching a bit and face slack in a way that is most certainly not sexy. It’s okay, though, HyukJae thinks, chuckling. No matter how much time passes, as long as he’s able to dance with DongHae by his side he’ll feel young, eternal, indestructible.

“Hae…” HyukJae says, his voice soft and fond and DongHae looks at him with doe eyes and goofy face HyukJae loves so much. “You look like crap—auch!” he lets himself fall backwards clutching the empty gym bag DongHae threw at him and laughing his ass off, so intensely his stomach starts aching, but it doesn’t matter because all the time he’s thinking _yes, this is it. This is what I want, forever._


	21. Truth might be Sweet (Cooking/Baking)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! It's been a while, but you know, life. Either way, we only have nine to go, so I can take it easy, I guess :3

 

A few days after DongHae finishes recording Miss Panda & Hedgehog (an absolute shit of a drama that HyukJae can’t help buying because DongHae appears so damn adorable in it) he recovers from the exhaustion of filming and dives into a “baker phase”.

He buys his own supplies (because Wookie and Minnie would kill him would he ever dare use theirs) and starts watching YouTube videos about how to make strawberry cakes and decorate them with fondant.

The thing is, though… DongHae can’t cook for shit. Like… he really, _really_ can’t.

God knows HyukJae loves his boyfriend, but there’s a limited amount of undercooked pies topped with spoilt cream he can pretend to like. Still, he tries to be supportive and cope with it as well as he’s able to. He even offers to have a baking afternoon one free Sunday afternoon so he can help—and in the process, supervise what the hell is going into DongHae’s food that’s making it taste so foul.

They start out easy: a simple key lime pie. DongHae’s got the crust down… until he somehow confuses baking soda with sugar (seriously?) and makes a whole mess of the mixing bowl.

At first the brunette looks appalled by the creepy looking mix but then he brightens up and suggest they go back to the supermarket so this time he can also get some new mixers and toppings and…

“NO! Enough is enough Hae!” HyukJae finally snaps. “You can’t keep wasting money on this shit! I’m sorry babe but you _suck._ You’re very good at _a lot_ of things—well, including sucking actually…” he shakes his head when he realizes he’s going off-topic. “Anyways, what I mean is, you gotta stop Hae.”

“Okay, okay” DongHae says defensively, eyeing HyukJae with disdain.  He brings a can of whipped cream and looks at it with this kicked-puppy expression that makes HyukJae’s stomach flip with guilt. “I’ll stop. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. You tried, it didn’t work out. It happens. Kind of me singing” he tries to joke about it, but DongHae glares fiercely at him; DongHae’s never liked when HyukJae puts down his singing. The brunette is always telling him how beautiful his voice is, how he should work on it and sing more. “Okay, not funny. How about I make it up to you?” he suggests instead and DongHae perks up with interest.

“Yeah? How?”

HyukJae takes the whipped cream can and wiggles his eyebrows mysteriously. He leans in to kiss DongHae softly, coaxing his mouth open. DongHae is too startled to actually respond, but he still follows HyukJae’s movements by instinct.

HyukJae steps away and raises the can, pressing it to DongHae’s mouth and letting a bit of cream fall between those awaiting lips. Just a dollop, though; choking his boyfriend would really put a damper on the sensual atmosphere after all. He then traces the cream-coated mouth with the tip of his own tongue, enjoying the mix of rich sweetness and sweet DongHae combined with the brunette’s startled whimper of _Hyukkie_.

“By putting this cream to good use” he whispers in a rough voice against his boyfriend’s creamed lips and DongHae groans from the back of his throat.

And so, as suddenly as it arrived, DongHae’s “baker phase” leaves to never return, which doesn’t mean HyukJae and he don’t continue buying whipped cream for… _other endeavors._


	22. Chaos (In battle, Side-by-Side)

It’s painfully ironic how grown famous men can be so intimidated by young screaming fangirls. Yet, it happens. More often than you think, in fact. Especially since K-pop’s gone worldwide. Asians are often very organized and keep their distance. Even sasaeng fans know there’s a sort of unspoken protocol at airports. Even so, things sometimes get out of hand there and security is needed, but all of that is _nothing_ compared to what idols experience overseas.

Out there it’s complete and utter _chaos._ The girls there (who, by the way, don’t even speak their same language or others they might be more familiar with) are frantic and shameless, desperate and drunk in an emotion they don’t get to experience with the same frequency as Asian fans, so maybe it’s understandable. That doesn’t make it comforting.

They do have a system, though: their motto is _keep going to the car no matter what happens; if you dare stop disorder will be increased_. Still, sometimes it’s so _hard_ and you honestly just want to tell them to go fuck themselves and push people out of the way to the van. Sadly, rules are rules. That hasn’t stopped KyuHyun or HeeChul of breaking them on a few occasions.

And DongHae wishes he had too, when HyukJae arrives to the car almost ten minutes later looking annoyed beyond himself and a little shaken as well. He’s so exhausted DongHae just wants to hug him and tell him it is okay, they’re safe and tranquil here, but HyukJae crawls to his side without saying anything. His mood is foul and he doesn’t want to be touched at first, however after a few minutes into the ride he scoots over DongHae’s side and allows the brunette to hug him, resting his head on DongHae’s shoulder for comfort. 

It’s not that they don’t want to be close to their fans, they _do_ appreciate their support and enthusiasm. It’s—they’re jet-lagged, tired, head-aching, hungry and just plain grumpy. They want to get to their hotel as soon as possible and black out. Also, it’s so humiliating sometimes, being treated like a circus animal, people touching you for no apparent reason, not letting you walk, making you trip and just downright disrespecting your personal space.

Yeah, it all comes with the fame and blah, blah, blah; sometimes that thought isn’t comforting enough to ease the uncomfortableness that can come with the whole airport routine.

“You think we’ll someday forget what this feels like?” HyukJae mumbles against DongHae’s neck without shifting his posture. His voice is unusually thin and tired. “That we’ll get to an airport and absolutely nobody will fuss about us because we’re that unimportant?”

“Mmm…” DongHae hums, thoughtfully.

For once DongHae feels the desire to lie to HyukJae; he knows the answer is both comforting and discouraging. No. And although he does feel relieved that they’ll always have fans that’ll support them through thick and thin, that also means they’ll never get to be ‘normal’. He’s torn. He’s always torn, ever since he debuted and got to experience what an idol life is really like—a lifelong lifestyle contract, a lifetime that will never be 100% yours to lead. Sometimes he loves it, sometimes he dreads it, but at the end the truth always dawns: it is what it is. There’s no going back. So you have to make the most of what you’ve got—which in their case is actually pretty sweet.

“I think there will come a time where we will be walking along those airports hand in hand” he says instead, an earnestly hopeful expression in his face, wishing that idea can put HyukJae at ease.

He must have said the right thing, because he feels HyukJae smile against his skin, and that’s all DongHae really needs to feel at home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, we're onto the last 8 omg. At first, I didn't know what to make of the "in battle" prompt but then I came up with this. Which is also something I feel very strongly about. I've seen my babes live so I know what it feels like, that adrenaline pump bording on desperation and anxiety, but it's no excuse to treat them like anything else than human beings. I hate going to the zoos and seeing caged animals and honestly at airports sometimes I feel like that's the way fangirls treat the people they suposedly love. So, next time you get the chance of being near someone you deeply admire, please don't be dicks(?)


	23. Fuck Off (Arguing)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only six more to go, shit! :O

 

Even perfect relationships aren’t really.

DongHae is sensitive and whiny and HyukJae can be very hot-headed when pissed off.

It’s not always the best of mixes…

So that night when HyukJae arrives with a massive headache after a super-annoying variety filming only to find a nonchalant Lee DongHae lying on his back on HyukJae’s _unmade_ bed, he snaps. “Hey, don’t you have a place with a bed and your own stuff in them? How’s that called?” he frowns to pretend he’s thinking, “oh yeah, _a room._ ”

DongHae lowers the manga— _HyukJae’s manga_ — and beams at him, quickly getting on his knees and jumping on the bed with excitement. “You’re here! I was waiting for you… I’ve missed you” he whispers, biting his lip seductively.

HyukJae is unimpressed.

“Yeah, no. I’m tired. I’ve been around too many people today. I want to be alone” he says, stripping off his closes to get into pajamas and ushering DongHae off the bed. The brunette stares at him open-mouthed, with an expression of having been just slapped across the face.

“Why? Too many girls hitting on you? _Poor HyukJae_ ” he childishly retorts and HyukJae groans mentally.

Ugh, not this again.

HyukJae squints his eyes at his boyfriend; this is about that show last week, where HyukJae nearly had to kiss a girl in a representation of a cheesy drama scene. In the end they both had laughed so much it had been impossible. Since then DongHae’s been extra clingy and even though he loves his partner, these days HyukJae’s been in overdrive and doesn’t possess the patience to deal with such unreasonable jealousy.

“Oh, screw you DongHae. Recordings are tiring and you well know it. What’s your problem? Have I ever said anything about your drama’s costars? You could be fucking _them_ for all I know, but I’m _rational_ and don’t go around assuming you sleep with everything that moves.”

“I would never do that” DongHae’s lip quivers but HyukJae’s not having any of it. It’s kind of the last straw, actually.

“Neither would I!” HyukJae says, suddenly standing from the bed and walking towards DongHae. Sometimes he feels as if DongHae is the only one who gets to be jealous, to act irrational, when he doesn’t even have the right to. HyukJae’s always been faithful; the flirty side being nothing more than part of EunHyuk’s character. “And I’m sick of you suggesting it every chance you get or every time I’m nice with girls on camera. Geez, Hae, sometimes I think not even a woman would make these little scenes of yours!”

DongHae’s mouth drops opens and HyukJae feels tempted to take his words back. The woman versus man thing is still an issue for DongHae (even though HyukJae doesn’t really get why; he’s been with DongHae for more than ten years, hasn’t he? He loves the guy as much as his life, why can’t he freaking _understand_ that?), and he sees the anger and hurt crossing his boyfriends features.

“Fine! Go fuck all your variety show girlfriends! Fuck them all at once for all I care!” DongHae screams, walking to the door but not quite exciting the bedroom. It’s obvious he expects his boyfriend to change his mind.

“Fine. Maybe I will” HyukJae says coldly instead, pushing DongHae the extra inch out of his room and closing the door on his face with a harsh slam.

There’s a couple-rule about not going to bed angry, isn’t there?

Well, right now both DongHae and HyukJae think said rule is bullshit.


	24. Kissing it Better (Making up Afterwards)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a loooong time. I've been reaaaally busy, BUT I hope you like it :3 Only six more to go.

HyukJae might be hot-headed, but he’s not resentful.

Once he calms down, he knows how to admit guilt and see the bigger picture. That doesn’t mean he likes admitting said guilt  _aloud_ by any means, but he can manage.

DongHae… he’s a whole other story.

He’s so much like a kid it can get ridiculous. He sulks and holds grudges akin to a five-year-old until he breaks down and comes back crawling and crying and begging for forgiveness. Much like a child, actually.

This time, however, HyukJae wants to be the one to apologize first—which, in all honesty, is not a daily occurrence. HyukJae is a proud man; he likes to be on the forgiving end. Nevertheless, he knows he overstepped the boundaries the last time. The whole girl thing is a sensitive subject for DongHae, and even if he finds it rather unbelievable because he’d never cheat on his boyfriend, he shouldn’t have pressed it. It was unfair.

He enters DongHae’s shared bedroom to find the brunette alone on his bed, browsing through the computer listening to sickeningly romantic American songs like he always does when he’s in a foul mood. 

He wants to say something, maybe touch his shoulder to gain DongHae’s attention, but it’s not necessary. The brunette, without looking at him, takes off his earphones and raises an eyebrow. It’s an invitation for HyukJae to speak.

“Want a massage?” he offers, biting his lip nervously. DongHae lifts his head in mild interest, his expression wary still. “An _I’m Sorry_ massage, how about it?”

DongHae holds his tongue between his teeth while he thinks, his eyes wandering around the room so slowly HyukJae feels tempted to scream at him to make up his fucking mind. But that’s just the nerves talking. DongHae finally puts away the laptop and turns around so his lying on his tummy, face turned to the wall. HyukJae understands immediately; it’s not forgiveness yet, but he’s invited to try.

He climbs on top of the brunette, hearing a tiny _oomph_ from him that almost makes HyukJae chuckle.

“Wanna take off your shirt?”

“Nope.”

HyukJae rolls his eyes and sighs begging for patience.

He slowly starts tracing DongHae’s clothed back up and down with open palms. Honestly, it’s more of a rub than a legitimate massage, but HyukJae isn’t in a splitting-hairs-mood.

“I just don’t get why you’re always jealous” HyukJae finally says, frustrated. “How can I convince you that I don’t want anyone else but you, silly head?” He mumbles, leaning down until his mouth is next to DongHae’s ear, his whole presence hovering over the brunette’s tense body.

“HyukJae…” DongHae breathes out and then mutters, “Sorry.”

HyukJae smiles against his neck, dropping a butterfly kiss there while slipping his arms securely around DongHae’s torso in a weird yet cozy hug.

They sure don’t like fighting, but the warm fuzzy feeling they get when they finally make up—it makes it _kinda_ worth it, doesn’t it?


	25. Luscious Luxury (Gazing into each other’s eyes)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this, the countdown begins!!

DongHae’s a hopeless romantic; he’s always owned up to that. He’d probably make a girl the happiest woman in the world had he swung that way—no, no probably, _definitely_. But, HyukJae thinks, nobody knows the _extent_ of DongHae’s poetic soul.

Like on one those scarce free days they get while recording in Europe and HyukJae wakes up to the sound of soft Hindi Zahra music and the sweet smell of luscious European food. There is something about Europe, about the intrinsic romance in the air, portrayed in so many ways on so many occasions, that makes HyukJae feel light in spite of the workload.

DongHae feels the same; free and away and _in love_ and he wants to pamper HyukJae, just because. Just because he can, just because they’re in a luxurious room of a luxurious hotel in a luxurious country far away from home and they can enjoy the luxury of enjoying each other.

HyukJae rolls around in the warm Egyptian cotton sheets and ask for the time, his mouth already watering with the warm decadent smells of caramel, coffee and butter.

“Twelve. I turned off your alarm. You don’t need any more workout, you _do_ need more sleep” DongHae mumbles in a light-hearted way. He’s happy to be able to give this to HyukJae, to have a soulmate to share his love with.

Dressed in the fuzzy bathrobes the hotel has put at their disposition, they sit next to each other around the small round table near the window to enjoy the food DongHae has carefully selected from the wide room-service’s menu.

HyukJae pecks DongHae, not just out of habit but because he feels like it. It’s a weird feeling. A feeling he discovers he likes nonetheless. He takes a bite out of the sweet crepes with berries and caramel and he makes a little happy sound that makes him blush a little. It’s not like he never eats, for God’s sake!

DongHae watches him eat in silence, head perched up on his hand. He has this goofy smile on his lips that lights up his whole face and HyukJae has to stop eating to just look at him in question. His eyes find DongHae’s chocolate ones, and what he finds there leaves him speechless.

DongHae’s eyes are deep and eternal, expressing all the feelings DongHae can’t with mere flimsy words—although not for lack of trying, that’s for sure.

The silence between them feels humid and heavy, too intense, but at the same time electric and perfect.

“You’re beautiful, HyukJae” DongHae finally says, soft and honest. His voice is natural and carefree, his smile tiny but heartfelt. His hand reaches out and like feathers his fingers trace the dyed hair, the cared for skin, the lush lips.

HyukJae’s heart just does crazy things inside his chest as he blushes and bites his lower lip. He thinks he should pull away, stop looking, stand up and make some stupid joke about DongHae being the cheesiest guy on Earth, but the thing is—he doesn’t want to. He likes this, _breathes_ for this. So when DongHae pulls him onto his lap and kisses him slow and deep, arms embracing him snuggly, mouth mumbling sweet endearments, all HyukJae can do is kiss back, hug back, smile back, because _this_ is how romantic DongHae can be and HyukJae _knows_ it, _adores_ it. 

He’d never admit it because some part of his macho-Korean-bred brain still thinks such things between two guys are kind of unmanly… But oh HyukJae loves it. He loves being _the one_.

The one who knows.

The one who gets to enjoy this.

The one who DongHae loves.


	26. One Ring to Rule them all (Getting Married)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #4 to go!

It had been stupid.

It had been risky.

It had been insanely romantic.

DongHae might be a hopeless poetic lover, but he’s not stupid. He won’t be able to legally marry HyukJae in Korea during this lifetime, and possible not during the next couple of lifetimes either.  He’s never made himself illusions about that. 

That’s why when HyukJae snuck up behind him with a Cheshire’s grin on his plump lips and  nonchalantly whispers in her ear: “Hey, Hae, would you marry me?” as if it was the most normal thing in the world, DongHae just raises an eyebrow and cocks his head, unimpressed.

 

 

“I don’t get it” he says, referring to what he can only guess is a joke, and HyukJae’s smile only grows wider.

“Let’s get married. Right here, right now.”

DongHae is about to ask if HyukJae’s been drugged by a crazy fan when HyukJae produces a small wooden box with two stunning blackened silver rings in it. They are thick and smooth and with subtle filigree engraving and DongHae just goes…

“Oh.”

And then…

“I see.”

HyukJae isn’t faced. After all, he’s never been one to do this sort of thing. He simply takes DongHae’s hand and slips the ring around his slim finger, smiling at how well it fits. DongHae doesn’t know what to say.

HyukJae’s always been an emotional person, DongHae knows; he feels intensely and straight to the core, but somehow he manages to hold them under his breath, locks them under his skin so tight they leak in small gestures like this one. There’s also the way in which he holds DongHae’s hand; so delicately and surely, like he treasures the moment even though he’s so used to small touches like this.

“Why?” DongHae finds himself eloquently asking.

“Because… I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I know we don’t really need a ring, and it’s kinda cheesy…”

DongHae has never felt need like he feels it at that moment. The need to be able to kiss HyukJae and show everybody who he loves, how he loves and how he is loved suffocates him. It frustrates him how he can’t even hold his boyfriend’s hand and his fingers itch. Tears well up in his eyes as his heart aches profoundly and just one word comes to mind: _unfair._

Instead, he says, solemnly and truthfully;

“I do.”

 

 

And that had been it.

They had gotten married.

Not that they would wear the rings, or tell anybody about it. In fact, DongHae wouldn’t find the engraved words on the inside for months, one night he’ll be distractedly spinning the ring between his fingers.

But back then, HyukJae’s rosy blush on their way back to the hotel while DongHae tried his best not to beam with happiness had been _everything_.


	27. Make a Wish (On one of their birthdays)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #3 more! OMG! {Fluff and more fluff}

“Are you happy to blow the candle, Hae?” HyukJae says in a sleazy tone, smirking in a way that makes it obvious what he’s implying.

DongHae scrunches up his nose, turning in HyukJae’s computer chair absentmindedly. “Ew, you’re disgusting.”

“You weren’t saying that last night.”

DongHae stares at him with an expression of disbelief, as if saying ‘Are you really an adult with a full-functioning brain?’ and HyukJae chuckles.

“Oh, don’t give me that look, I’m just joking,” he pulls DongHae into his lap, hugging him snuggly and burying his face in the curve of DongHae’s ever warm neck.

DongHae plays along, finding the attention odd but welcomed. HyukJae plays with the longer locks of his boyfriend’s hair while he stares at him adoringly.

“Hey, it’s twelve o’clock already!” he thumbs DongHae’s cheek and lifts his chin to look at him in the eye. “Happy birthday, baby” HyukJae mumbles, his voice low and loving and DongHae realizes that HyukJae has been keeping him occupied the past two hours just so he can be the first one to wish him a happy birthday.

And with such realization DongHae’s heart does this leap-y thing and then stops and then starts beating furiously all in less than three seconds; then he pulls HyukJae in for a deep kiss that leaves them breathless.

DongHae has been in love for almost half his life now, and sometimes he forgets what it felt like in the beginning, those nervous butterflies that only come with the unknown.

Good thing HyukJae’s always there to remind him when needed. 


	28. 떴다 오빠! (Doing something ridiculous)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #2 more to go! :O

In all honesty, DongHae’s fucking jealous.

He knows it shouldn’t really matter; HyukJae and he have been together for most of their lives, are committed to each other in body and soul, will be together for eternity and blah, blah, blah— he wants the other stuff too!

He wants to have an extravagant wedding, public recognition, kids, PDA—he wants to be able to wear his fucking ring every time, at the same time than his husband.

There’re no words to describe how freaking _jealous_ he is when SungMin finally ties the knot with SaEun-ssi, and then not even half a year later, he is yet to attend another wedding: HeeChul’s sister’s. It’s not personal, it really isn’t. It just bothers him how unimportant the fact that he’s been together with the same person for almost fifteen years is compared to the fact that both parts involved have a dick. Fuck everyone.

He’s not an asshole, though, so he still attends the wedding and puts on a bright smile, even though he can’t help the pang of envy that tugs at him during the ceremony.

“I want this” DongHae whispers into HyukJae’s ear, being careful of not appearing so obviously close.

HyukJae looks at him with eyes full of emotion as he sighs. _He knows_ , DongHae thinks, and the idea comforts him a little.

“I know. Me too.”

It’s not enough, not nearly enough, but then at the party he and HyukJae get into the dancing platform and start singing Oppa Oppa and everybody starts laughing (including themselves) and DongHae realizes—they won’t be able to bring happiness to people like this for much longer, ten years seeming like too far ahead in the future even if the past ten years have passed in a blink of an eye.

There’s a lifetime to be together, to enjoy peace and calmness and all that grown up shit.

It still kind of bothers him, though, that probably even when the idol-phase has passed they won’t really be able to have a _normal grown up_ life. But he’ll let future DongHae to worry about that—all present DongHae has to do is enjoy his career and the man he loves…

…And maybe run away from JungSoo hyung who looks half like a snorting duck with laughter and half murderous from his members’ embarrassing shenanigans.


	29. Peppering Kisses (Doing something sweet)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #1 left to gooooooooo!!!!!!! :O  
> {Warning: super-ultra-extra-fluff (i mean... look at the prompt lol)}

Disgusting, that’s what they are.

Well, that’s what HeeChul calls them. They might have to agree on this one, though.

But hey; it is the middle of the summer and it’s _so freaking unbearably_ hot. They are not alone, but it feels so because everyone is napping or reading or trying to fuse with the AC. Choco’s visiting. They have cold glasses of iced soda by their side.

They are sitting on the floor, face to face, their legs intertwined; HyukJae’s over DongHae’s. Their socked feet nudge the other’s ribs once in a while. The little Pomeranian sits in the safe circle the men’s legs create, and wiggles her tail happily when one of the two comes closer to peck the other. Sometimes the pecks become something more, last a little longer, but they keep it playful—for the most of it. In the background a weird mix of Jang WooHyuk, James Blunt, Sistar, Michael Jackson and Justin Timberlake is playing, and they subconsciously sway to the soft beats of their playlist.

It’s like they’re teenagers again, but better, because they aren’t really—funny how that works, huh?

JungSoo-hyung makes his way from his room to the kitchen, an empty tea mug in his hands. He scrunches up his nose when he sees them, but a playful smile still makes its way to his lips. “Oh come on, I didn’t come back all the way from the army for this!”

The couple giggles against each other’s lips but don’t pay attention, too busy playing with the other’s fingers and nosing the other’s cheek.

Choco barks in protest when DongHae leans into HyukJae even more, cupping his face in his hands and kissing him in earnest.

“Can I barf?” HeeChul says (and when did _he_ get into the room followed by GunHee— who by this point has become a more-than-regular visitor—who the hell knows), putting his best barfing-face on. GunHee chuckles and puts an arm around HeeChul’s shoulders, mumbling he should lighten up and let ‘the kids’ have fun. HeeChul looks at him as if he’s said he is growing a Unicorn in the bathroom…

…But takes a picture anyways, the old (self-denying) sap of a hyung. 

Choco wiggles her tail again when the flash goes off, DongHae keeps kissing HyukJae and life is perfect just the way it is. 


	30. Sneak Peek (Doing something hot)

Okay, so they _do_ have a lot of clothes.

Okay, so they _might_ have had to donate more than some of them to new trainees just because they didn’t have any room in their dorms.

But, _come on,_ they so rarely get the chance to _really_ go window-shopping with no cameras or managers, just regular men (albeit incredibly good looking and famous and with lots of money) trying on stuff and not having to sound funny or interesting every second of recording. That’s the good thing about _abroad_ ; it’s far and they are only known by a select group of Hallyu Wave fans. Nice and discreet—most of the times, at least. If this is one of those times, how can they no take advantage of it?

So they do.

They agree to meet two hours later and each head their own way, LeeTeuk and KangIn immediately heading for the casual, Tommy-Hilfiger-Ralph-Lauren-y style while SiWon wanders off to go buy (even more) suits at some exclusive posh store, while DongHae and HyukJae go full urban and dig into a hole-in-the-wall store filled with awesome vintage kicks and neon designer hoodies, very Alexander McQueen ready-to-wear meets Jeremy Scott meets Vivienne Westwood of the good times.

The couple splits and they get lost into the thousands of garments the place offers, agreeing on meeting in thirty minutes or so.

HyukJae has grabbed himself almost fifteen different items when he heads for the changing rooms, with in all fairness aren’t more than three consecutive stalls with heavy blood red curtains.  He notices the feet that peek from under the curtain and smirks, thinking of ways to startle his boyfriend. However, the moment he sees what he’s wearing his smile fades and his pupils dilate instantly.

It’s _so_ not DongHae’s style—more as if HyukJae’s sport closet had thrown up all over him; he’s wearing leopard-print dancer pants that curve beautifully over his delicious ass and cling to his hips like gloves, a black hoodie with a neon print that’s plump and snug and makes a delicious contrast with the T-shirt underneath, which is semi-translucent and bares a lot of skin on each side in a typical “HyukJae-cut”. He looks… Fucking amazing.

 “Make room” HyukJae whispers, his voice low and feral. He’s usually really good (certainly better than DongHae) at controlling his emotions, at pretending he feels nothing more than loving friendship towards his bandmate—but _damn,_ DongHae looks _good_ in that outfit.

“This is my changing room, go look for your own!” DongHae protests seeming consternated that HyukJae has caught him. His boyfriend doesn’t comply nor has any intention to do so. “I was—do you like this?”

“Oh, _yes”_ HyukJae says, splaying his palm over DongHae’s torso and pushing him flat against the mirror. He burrows his face in the curve of DongHae’s neck and leaves a wet and hungry kiss there, his hand moving up to the base and curving, thumb pressing lightly over the pulse point.

“It’s… for you” DongHae sighs, automatically spreading his legs more when HyukJae’s right one makes the way between them.

“Mmm. Well, it’s _very_ nice” HyukJae says, moving his leg against DongHae’s crotch teasingly.

“The clothes, I mean, HyukJae” DongHae clarifies, trying to sound firm but failing miserably.  HyukJae’s hand has made its way under his Tee and he can’t find any damns to give. “I… I was trying them to see if they… You know… Size.” Yeah, eloquence, what’s that when he’s got his smoking hot boyfriend all over him in a foreign country where they won’t ever be recognized, even if they were to fu…?

“Oh. They’re cool. They do look better on this ass, though” he bites DongHae’s earlobe as his other hand squeezes the younger’s ass over the fabric… and then _under,_ and DongHae fucking _whines_. “So needy for me, aren’t you Hae?”

“Oh fuck you” DongHae groans, grabbing HyukJae’s face and pulling him into a desperate kiss, all lips and tongue and handful grabs of whatever they can. DongHae brings a leg around HyukJae’s lithe hip and practically glues himself to his boyfriend, their bodies fused together as HyukJae pins him to the wall, fucking his mouth with an expertise that makes his head spin with desire. It’s dangerous and wrong but oh so hot, and _so_ perfect; they really should stop, but holy sh—

 

“YOU’RE NEVER SHOPPING ALONE EVER AGAIN!” SungMin screams from outside, his Adidas bags dropping heavily to the ground.

“In a minute” DongHae manages to choke out, because boy it’s hard to talk when HyukJae’s dropped to his knees and is about to swallow him whole like the pro he’s learnt to be.  

“Oh my God!” SungMin screams. “I’m telling hyung!” he threatens, but leaves anyway because it’s less embarrassing than pulling them out from the changing room and risk… _seeing_ things.

Speaking of pulling out— “ _Hyukjae…”_

“JungSoo-hyung!” SungMin screams into his cellphone.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finished. Bye bye. I'm done for ever... (?)  
> Jk, I'm doing a new drabbles series really soon xd But hey! This is done :3  
> Keep shipping <3

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there! Let me tell you, it's been a long, long loooong time since I wrote any EunHae, but I've been dying to do the 30 Day OTP Challenge. And I thought to myself, "hey, Myself, why don't we break into our AO3 account with it?" So this is it. It's really just a lot of fluffy, earnest EunHae as I've seen and shipped for all these years.


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